I'm speechless!

Okay so I'm in shock! For Christmas this year I got a kindle, a Northface Jacket, Guy Harvey shirts, and two positive pregnancy tests. Yes.. baby #3 is on the way! At first I was a little sad (and this makes me feel bad) because I had this pregnancy planned out. I was going to get into the LPN Program, graduate, get a great job, possible sell our house, and then have another baby. I guess God had another plan. I admit, and I don't want anyone to get upset with me because I'm upset with myself, I cried when I found out and few days after.

Even though I had a healthy baby after Lilly, I still can't help being a little apprehensive and scared about this pregnancy. My first doctors appointment was Thursday January 6 and it went well. Oh course I was offered Genetic testing again. I guess once high risk always high risk. And again I refused all genetic testing except ultrasounds. Whether this baby is healthy or not, this is my child and a precious gift. No genetic testing will truely prepare you to leave the hospital with empty arms.

After my appointment, I felt a little down. I am not sad about being pregnant, I am sad about possibly having to put off school another year. I refuse to be sad about being pregnant because just like Lilly and Dylan, this baby deserves my happiness and excitment.

Michael and I have already picked out names! Girl: Faith Elizabeth Knox and Boy: Tanner John Knox

Faith Elizabeth is the name I picked out and I have been praying over since Lilly passed away. Her name means Trust consecrated to God. I believe it has taken my faith in God to get me through so much in the past 4 years and her name is dedicated to that faith and struggle.

Can you tell by now that I'm hoping for a girl? :)